Merry Christmas!

Sisters! I bring to you the Adored,

The Eternal God, so small, so weak;

I plead for the Incarnate Word,

Because as yet He cannot speak.

To Jesus, exiled from His home,

The cruel world no shelter grants;

And so to Carmel's shade I come,

  To find the shelter that He wants.

Ever your praise, your tenderness,

Your welcome sweet, your warm caress,

Be for this Child!

Oh, burn with love, for He loves you,

   This Child, who is your God and Lord.

Pathetic mystery! He who begs, tonight, of you,

Is the Eternal Word!

Come then, my Sisters! without fear,

Each in her turn, to Jesus' feet,

Offering your love to Him most dear,

And you shall know His will so sweet,

Yes, I will tell you the desires

Of Jesus born amid the snow;

For you are pure as angels are,

And you can suffer too, you know!

Ever your cares, your suffering,

And all your joys so light of wing,

Be for this Child!

Oh, burn with love, for He loves you,

This Babe, who is your God and Lord!

Pathetic mystery! He who begs, tonight, of you,

Is the Eternal Word!

(From THE LITTLE DIVINE BEGGAR OF CHRISTMAS by St. Therese of Liseaux)

Wish I Had Learned Latin When I Was Young

A couple of years ago, I discovered the Latin Mass (or EF). It was new and interesting, but completely weird. I didn't understand the language nor the order of the Mass. I just watched everyone else and stood when they stood, kneeled when they kneeled and sat when they sat. The church was so quiet while the priest performed Mass with little input from the congregation. There was no chatting or kids playing in the seats. Everyone was focused on the Mass and being reverent. It was weird and I wasn't sure I would attend that Mass again.

Fast forward to today. I still occasionally attend the Latin Mass and now even recognize a few words. There is no hope left that I will ever figure out the order of the mass, but I keep trying. There is a beauty to the Latin Mass that isn't present in the Norvus Ordo (NO) Mass. I am greatful that Pope Benedict XVI (now Pope Emeritus) brought back this beautiful tradition.

I come from the lost generation of Catholics. We are the ones who never learned Latin, never learned the specifics of our faith and basically got short changed. It took me years, but I am now beginning to learn all of the things that I should have learned when I was younger. Only it is much harder this time around. Thanks to the internet and thousands of Catholic resources doing so is much easier.

Youtube is one of my favorite resources for all things Latin. You can view EF Masses, pray along with the rosary in Latin, learn a little Latin, and so much more.

What are your favorite Latin resources?

It's Official

There's me with Father. I am now officially accepted into formation to pursue study towards my first promise. It still doesn't seem quite real yet. I can't get over the idea that I need to step it up a notch now that I'm official.

To celebrate, we had this beautiful cake that was almost too pretty to cut into. It was just as yummy as it looked.




The best surprise was my formation partner returned and we have a new Aspirant as well. Our little community is growing.

It's Almost Time

My Aspirancy is almost over. Tomorrow morning I will be officially accepted into the OCDS to begin working towards making my first promise. It's exciting and scary all at once.

May will mark two years since my first contact with the OCDS. It doesn't feel like its been that long, but it has. And I've learned so much about the Order, about God and about myself. I have not always lived up to my calling as a secular. Sometimes I am my own worst obstacle when in comes to prayer times and religious observance. But, I try.

There is so much more that I still need to learn about the Church and God. How do you condense 2000 years worth of learning into a lifetime or in my case a 1/2 a lifetime? It's a little overwhelming.

Anyways - please pray for me as I make this next step.

Love In A New Way

Holy week is my favorite time of year, especially the Triduum. It's the one time of year when there are tons of religious activities going on. Because I work I'm not able to make it to most of the activities, but I try to go to as many as I can. And at the end of it all is the Triduum, when mass is held in the evenings at a reasonable time, that I can go to.

This year I didn't go to any Triduum services because Thursday afternoon I became ill. I spent then entire weekend in bed, except for the hour on Easter morning when I drug myself to the entirely too early Latin Mass. I would have preferred to go to Mass later in the day, but with how packed the churches are on Easter Sunday, I decided that I would infect less people if I went to the sparcely attended Latin Mass.

I took a seat as far away from the other 50 or so people in the Cathedral and didn't go to communion. The Latin Mass was as foreign as ever, but since I have been practicing my Latin prayers there were a few recognizable words.

Before I knew it, Lent and Easter were over and I felt so cheated out of the wonder and beauty that is the Triduum. I should be joyous that even though I missed the suffering and misery, I was there to witness the resurrection. To have Jesus with us, once again, to spread the glorious news of God. Instead, I'm feeling like Thomas who focused on what was lost and couldn't see what was gained.

So throughout this Easter season I am going in search of the beauty of Christ's return; walk with him as he reveals himself to his followers; look at the world with new eyes; think wiht a new mind; and love in a new way.

Such A Long Week

I am completely worn out and really, I haven't done a lot. Between periods of actual work, I popped on the internet to catch up on the latest news. How revolting that was. I am so thoroughly sick of the hate and criticism that is passed off as news, not to mention the comments that accompany the articles.

POPE FRANCIS

The poor Pope is barely installed as Pope and he has been accused of everything from getting two priests kidnapped to supporting gay civil unions. Everyone seems to know that he is going to change this or that teaching and of course sell off the Church's treasures. Pirahna would be jealous of the feeding frenzy that is the state of news today. They seem to have a motto of "If you have nothing to report...make it up!"

GAY EVERYTHING AND TWINKIES

If you aren't on the gay parade...you are a bigot. That seems to be the concensus of all gay all the time news and its supporters. I think some of those people need to look in the mirror, because there seems to be far more hate and bigotry coming from the pro-ssm side than the anti-ssm side.

It's exhausting having to weed through article after article of the latest has-been Hollywood star who now professes to be "gay" (as if we didn't know this information already) or how some "claims-to-be" Catholic "nun" supports ssm and "gay rights" just trying to find a single article that is actually news worthy. Is it too much to ask for real news (things that are important and we don't already know)?

I did get to see a rainbow colored house that some activists bought and painted across the street from Westboro Baptist Church. While I like fun colored stuff and don't care too much for the Westboro Baptist Church, I would secretly repaint the house in the middle of the night something less obnoxious. (I'd probably also get caught and thrown in jail, but I'd use the Twinkie defense...as in I went mad because there aren't any Twinkies...I'd totally get acquitted. But, I had better hurry because they are coming back this summer.)

GAVE UP

I finally gave up trying to find any news from the mainstream media. I don't really want to want to read divisive opinions that are passed of as news. I don't want to read about the groundhog being charged for making a "false" prediction. And I certainly don't want to read mean hateful comments attaching everything and everyone.

Someone please let me know when the news becomes news again.

Pope Francis

What a wonderful surprise! Such a humble and holy man. I look forward to seeing where this shepherd will lead.

E-book on Benedict XVI

The Vatican has put out an awesome e-book with pictures and everything on the pope emeritus, Bendict XVI. Check it out here.

I Feel So Popeless

It didn't seem quite so real as today that Benedict is no longer the Pope. I really liked Benedict. He was so cute in his red hat and shoes.

Most of all I liked that he oozed humility and kindness. He was a true servant of God.

I pray that the next Pope will be as strong and orthodox as Benedict with his great humility and kindness. But, the next Pope needs to be strong in body as well. Someone who can lead the Church through the rough times that are ahead. Someone who people will follow. Someone who will make the Church stronger.

Busy Busy

This year Lent snuck up on me. I wasn't prepared when Ash Wednesday hit. Okay, I'm still not prepared, but I'm just going with it. This year, I'm leaving Lent up to God. And he's already decided what I'll be giving up for Lent...free time.

I'd prefer to give up something easy, like giving up Facebook or ice cream. But, giving up something easy that doesn't cause sacrifice isn't really giving it up. It's just postponing something that you aren't attached to.

Free time, for me is something that I am greatly attached to. I don't like being scheduled every minute of every day doing stuff for someone else. I like having time to be selfish and self-indulgent. I, of course, never saw it as selfish or self-indulgent behavior. But, this Lent, it's beginning to sink in what real sacrifice is.

Blessed Theresa of Calcutta, pray for me so that I can do God's bidding and work tirelessly as you did for the poor. 

I Can't Believe It

Saint Anthony has come through. My thumb drive has been found. It just all of a sudden appeared a few minutes ago in the drawer where I normally put it. I swear it was not there previously, I completely emptied that draw several times looking for it. It was not there. Thank you, St. Anthony!

Now I'm going to back this baby up so that if it gets lost again I don't lose everything.

Ohhh No You Didn't

There is a disturbing video I saw yesterday put out by WOC. After seeing the video, WOC could very well stand for Women On Crack, because the video is that bad. But, no WOC stands for Women's Ordination Conference. Not much difference between the two, I know.

Normally, I just pray for these misguided souls. After all they are like rats running in place. Women will never be ordained as Deacons or Priests. If they want to wear themselves out fighting a losing battle and risk losing their soul, there is not much I can do to stop them.

What I take offense to is not their laughable "promo" video, which does more to make fun of their cause than to promote it, but to their blasphemy of Saint Therese to promote their cause. They claim that she wanted to be a priest and that if she were alive, would support their efforts. They apparently haven't been paying attention to St. Therese at all.

While Saint Therese did say in her biography, Story of A Soul, that she aspired to be a priest, she went further than that. She wanted to be a Priest, a Martyr, a Prophet, a Missionary, a Doctor of the Church, a Saint. She wanted to be all things for God because she loved Him above all things.

To be Thy Spouse, O my Jesus, to be a daughter of Carmel, and by my union with Thee to be the mother of souls, should not all this content me? And yet other vocations make themselves felt—I feel called to the Priesthood and to the Apostolate—I would be a Martyr, a Doctor of the Church. I should like to accomplish the most heroic deeds—the spirit of the Crusader burns within me, and I long to die on the field of battle in defence of Holy Church. ~ Story of A Soul, Chapter 11

She goes on to talk of how she would glorify each position if it was hers. And states that if she had been offered the priesthood, out of humility she would decline it as St. Francis of Assisi did.

She longed to do big things for God! But, she understood that God had not given her the means or the gifts to do such big things. He had given her the gifts to do little things for him. She was called to be obedient and humble of heart.

To such folly as this what answer wilt Thou make? Is there on the face of this earth a soul more feeble than mine? And yet, precisely because I am feeble, it has delighted Thee to accede to my least and most child-like desires, and to-day it is Thy good pleasure to realise those other desires, more vast than the Universe. These aspirations becoming a true martyrdom, I opened, one day, the Epistles of St. Paul to seek relief in my sufferings. My eyes fell on the 12th and 13th chapters of the First Epistle to the Corinthians. I read that all cannot become Apostles, Prophets, and Doctors; that the Church is composed of different members; that the eye cannot also be the hand. The answer was clear, but it did not fulfill my desires, or give to me the peace I sought. “Then descending into the depths of my nothingness, I was so lifted up that I reached my aim.”  ~Story of a Soul, Chapter 11

Saint Therese understood that everyone has a different role to play in the Church. If God created you to be a Priest, or Martyr, or Doctor of the Church, he certainly would have given you the gifts to be such.

The WOC is conveniently choosing to ignore this incite by Saint Therese. They are ignoring her call to obedience to the Church and its leaders, even if they think they may be wrong. They are ignoring her call to humility and charity and her call to love God above all else.

They are using the name of a beautiful saint and taking what she said out of context to push their own selfish desires. Their love is only for themselves and not for God. For if it was, they would follow Therese's lead and abandon those silly ideas.

The Internet is a Wonderful Thing

As I posted previously, we are studying the section on the Holy Spirit from the Catechism as part of formation. There are sections that I've read over, looked at other sources and am still stuck on. And I'm not the type of person to let it go if I don't understand something. I will keep searching until I not only get an answer, but I also understand it.

Today I finally understand it, with the help of CatholicCity.com and their Catechism Simplified. After finding that site, it dawned on me that in order to understand some of the sections you need to read the references in the footnotes, which I was not doing. Catechism Simplified uses those footnotes to help explain what the Catechism is saying.

Okay, I'm a little slow sometimes. I would be much farther along if I had just read the footnotes. But, I wouldn't have discovered a bunch of great blogs and websites if I had gone the easy route. Someday I will add a page to this site with all of my absolutely most favorite websites and blogs.

For anyone like me that has long lists of blogs that they check out, you need Google Reader. It compiles all of the new postings into one screen where you can weed through them. You can also set up folders and categorize your sites, star your favorite posts and mark posts for later reading. It is a huge time saver and I don't miss the posts from people who don't blog on a regular basis (like me).

Anyways...back to my Catechism reading.